A Holy Privilege: Giving Thanks for Birth

It's 9 in the morning, the day before Thanksgiving, and both of my kids are sleeping. (Auggie is down for his nap, and Lucy is sleeping in).  With these few rare moments of peace, and preparing for Thanksgiving, I'm finding myself overwhelmed with gratitude for the two births that I've been given. 

Though Lucy was born in a hospital in the standard semi-reclined-holding-my-legs-back position, I would still say it was the most amazing experience of my life.  I had a drug-free, 10-hour long birth with her, staying at home for seven hours and arriving at the hospital at 7cm dilated.  The ways I pushed my body (or my body pushed me), were unlike anything I had ever experienced before, and unlike anything I could have imagined.  I conquered that birth, despite the distractions of being in a hospital and being cared for by less-than-sensitive people.  The sense of empowerment I felt after birthing her was incredible!  I felt so strong, like I could move mountains if I wanted to. 


Auggie's birth was also unreal.  I could not have asked for a better birth team or a more peaceful environment... although maybe I would have asked for a longer labor??  :)  Seriously, though, with Lucy's labor I enjoyed the challenge of staying in a rhythm with my contractions.  Aug's hit me so hard and fast I remember hardly being able to catch my breath!  It was awesome, though.  The experience of being weightless in a pool in my living room, in the midst of the crazy pressure I felt with those last contractions, was amazing.  I will never forget the moment I reached down and felt his tiny body, lifting him up out of the water to meet him for the very first time.

I have been blessed.  And my births have shaped me in ways I never thought possible.  And so I find myself giving thanks to my Creator for His wonderful design for birth, and how I have been able to experience Him more through these two babies being born through me.  What a holy privilege it is, whether in the hospital or at home, all-natural or medicated or c-section, to partake in Creation through childbirth.

Wool Diapering with Auggie!

When I was pregnant with Lucy, I thought about using cloth diapers. I decided against it for a few reasons... The amount of information on the internet was so massive I didn't know where to start.  I didn't have any friends at the time who used cloth, so had no one to ask about it.  And I just figured it'd be way too gross and inconvenient.

When Luce was a few months old we met some friends from Wisconsin in Madison, and their youngest at the time was in diapers.  My friend, Lauren, showed me her cloth "system," which consisted of cloth prefolds, wool covers, and a wet bag.  She seemed pretty excited about it, and told me how easy it was.  She explained that the wool covers get a little wet, but you just let them dry and they're good to go for the next change!  I really couldn't wrap my mind around it.  Cloth diapering, maybe, but wool covers that you don't even wash in-between changes??  Gross!

Fast forward a few years to my pregnancy with Augustine.  Almost ALL of my friends used cloth, and I had been able to see firsthand how easy and routine it can be!  The thought of using wool covers was starting to seem attractive, so through the last half of my pregnancy I had several phone conversations with Lauren to pick her brain about it!

I learned that wool is both water-resistant and moisture wicking.  Wool keeps baby cool in the summer and warm in the winter.  It's breathable, which protects against diaper rash, since all that moisture isn't trapped inside against baby's bottom.  And the most amazing thing to me is that wool is naturally antibacterial, anti-fungal, and antimicrobial.  (This is why you don't have to wash it in-between changes--wool naturally neutralizes the urine!)  And they are absolutely, without a doubt, the cutest diapers I have ever seen.  Why are more people not using wool??  It is the perfect diapering solution.

 

The only downside is the expense.  Wool diapers can cost up to $30 a piece--yikes!  But Lauren came to my rescue again and shared a free pattern to make your own "soakers" out of recycled wool sweaters.  So I scoured the local thrift stores for sweaters, and proceeded to make Auggie 6 brand new and adorable diaper covers for less than $10 total.  Hooray!!

 

 

 

 

And in case you were wondering what happens if daddy accidentally shrinks a soaker in the wash...

 



 

 

:)

 

 

Back to Work!

For the past few months, I've been enjoying a break from doula work, so I could focus on my own pregnancy, birth, and adjust to having a new baby in the house!  The best part about my little break has been not having to keep my phone on me 24-7.  (Ask my husband, I lose it at least 8 times a day.  I don't even know where it is now.)  The worst part has been, well... not working as a doula!  I love this job so much. 

I'm gearing up to begin doula-ing again when little Auggie is a few months old, and am officially taking clients starting in January!  So to kick off this new chapter in my doula career, here are a couple of new videos that have been in the works for a while.

An interview with testimonials from some of my awesome clients...

 

 

And a music video we made last Spring...  Enjoy!



 

 



Augustine's Birth. 9.2.2012

31 Weeks!

Throughout the last half of my pregnancy, I had been having lots of braxton-hicks contractions.  On Friday, August 31st, they started to hurt--and become regular!  I thought that this could be the beginning of labor, so that evening I called our midwife, Steph, and told her what was going on.  She asked if I had been drinking water, and I realized that I hadn't been, so I got some water and started hydrating myself, and my contractions began to slow down.  Even still, they continued even when I got into bed, and I began timing them and relaxing through them.  At around midnight I got up and went into to Auggie's room to sit in the glider.  After about an hour of sitting there, I was getting tired and bored--contractions were not becoming stronger or closer together--so I went back to bed.  I woke up the next morning feeling a little discouraged and moody, but not too bad.

Saturday we just had a laid-back family day.  I was kind of irritable and despite staying super hydrated, was still getting regular, semi-painful contractions throughout the day.  In the afternoon, we went to the grocery story for a few items, and then to blockbuster for "pizza and a movie night"  (ie. "mommy's-having-contractions-and-doesn't-want-to-cook-or-do-anything-else" night).  Lucy picked out Cars, but got bored half-way through and started climbing on us and being goofy, and I did NOT want to be touched... ugh!  Finally, Greg put her to bed and gave me a great massage.  I headed up to bed early, because I was super exhausted from staying up until 2am the night before.

I laid down shortly after nine, and at around 9:30 my contractions started to intensify.  I began to time them, and called Greg up at around 10, after a particularly strong one.  I said, "I think we need to call Steph" (our midwife).  He said, "Well, let's work through a few more contractions, just to make sure this is the real thing."  I agreed, but at the peak of my next contraction, I said, "Actually, we need to call her now."  It was getting intense so, so fast.

So Greg got to work, calling midwife, doula, mom and sister, telling them it was time!  He also got the futon downstairs pulled out into a bed and put sheets on it, brought the pool in from the garage and started filling it up, and made several trips upstairs to check on me and make sure I was okay.

I stayed lying in bed for awhile, trying my hardest to relax and get into a groove with my sudden and powerful contractions.  Then I felt a little trickle of fluid and headed into the bathroom to check on it.  Greg came up and I told him I thought my water had broken--he was talking to Steph on the phone, who told him to make sure it was clear (that the baby hadn't pooped).  I labored on the toilet for a little bit, and then headed to sit in the glider in Auggie's room (pretty much the same thing I did while I was in labor with Lucy!).  The cushioned seat was really comfortable, but my contractions were intensifying at a speedy pace.

At some point while I was sitting there, our awesome doula, Katie, got here, and I remember she and Greg sitting in there with me.  Greg said that everything downstairs was ready, so I could head on down if I wanted to.  I didn't want to move, but I was moaning through the contractions and didn't want to wake Lucy, so after one contraction, I stood up and walked/ran downstairs, trying to make it to the futon before my next rush.  I crashed on the bed and immediately got another contraction, which I tried my best to relax through.  Greg and Katie sat with me, moaning with me and helping me to keep my rhythm. 

(Side note:  having a doula was AMAZING.  We didn't have a doula through my labor with Lucy, so this was a new experience for me.  It was so cool to be on the receiving end of doula care!  Just  having her presence there with me was helpful in a way I can't really put into words.  I remember thinking to myself that just her close proximity and quiet attentiveness made my contractions literally hurt less.  Knowing that there was someone there who was 100% focused on supporting me and helping me was a huge burden lifted.)



Midwife Steph holding my hand,
nurse Karen behind me

At some point my mom got there, and I called her over to hold my hand.  It was dark, and there were candles lit--a perfectly peaceful atmosphere for labor.  (While she was holding my hand I got a really strong rush, and moaned through it.  Afterwards she told me she didn't realize I was having a contraction, and was shocked that I didn't squeeze her hand.  She thought I was sleeping!)

Next our nurse, Karen, arrived, and I wanted to hold her hand, too.  (During my labor with Lucy, I did NOT want any type of physical touch... for some reason this time holding hands was extremely helpful).  I love Karen.  She sort of has a motherly personality, and she LOVES everything about mamas and labor and babies--I have never met anyone as passionate as she is about what she does!  Her presence in our house was also extremely reassuring.



Comforted by my sister

At some point our midwife, Steph, arrived, although I have no recollection of when that happened!  It was clear that my labor was nearing the end, and people were suggesting that I move to the tub  (again, I didn't want to move!).  I asked if it would make my labor hurt less , and Karen laughed and said, "Absolutely!"  So I sat up on the bed and got another rush.  The baby was so low that I had to use my arms to hold my bottom off of the bed--it felt like I was sitting on him!  I somehow made it into the water and felt huge relief.  All that incredible pressure was immediately relieved.  Being weightless was amazing.  I had no idea where Greg was, and asked him if he was in the water with me, and he said, "Yep!"  I was on my knees, leaning over the edge of the pool.

He's coming out!

My sister got here just in time (she was driving in from Chicago), and I only half-way remember her arrival.  I did sense her presence, though--she was rubbing my arm and reassuring me through the most intense contractions of my entire labor.  It was such a blessing to have her here.

Shortly after I got in the water I got the urge to push.  This is my least favorite part about labor.  (During Lucy's labor, I remember breathing through these pushing contractions--I had gotten into such a good groove with my labor that I didn't want to change things up!)  This time I did the same thing, but Auggie was on his way out with or without my help.  I think I sort of just grunted through a few contractions, felt the burning "ring of fire" and in my semi-conscious state  realized he was almost out.  Greg's hand was on my perineum, to help guide baby out, and once his head was out I felt such relief!  I instinctively reached down as I pushed the rest of  his tiny body out, and said, "Where's my Auggie?  Where's my Auggie?"  I pulled him up out of the water and he immediately began to cry.  When I first saw his face, I remember thinking that he looked familiar.  That somehow I had already known what he looked like--that this was my son.

Catching my baby.

Greg and I reclined in the pool, and my sister brought Lucy down to meet Auggie.  She was amazing, and marveled at meeting her new baby brother.  Shortly after that, they had us move to the bed to deliver the placenta.  I carried my newborn son over, still attached to me with the umbilical cord, and cuddled with him while we waited for the cord to stop pulsing, and Greg and Lucy cut it together.  Then Greg got some male-bonding time with his new baby while Stephanie stitched up my small tear.

Steph, Karen, and doula Katie wrapped things up, and my mom took Lucy back upstairs to bed.  Suddenly, everyone was gone, and it was just Greg, Auggie, and me.  We were told to try and get some sleep, but it was nearly impossible after having birthed my baby boy!  There was so much love it was keeping me awake.  I cuddled with Aug while Greg emptied the pool, then we settled in together.  Lying there, Greg commented on how normal this all seemed, and I agreed.  What a blessing to have had such a beautiful and peaceful birth, meeting my baby in our home surrounded by the love and support of some amazing people.

Our team! 
Karen, Steph, doula Katie, Me and Auggie,
 Greg, Lucy, and sister Katie

Labor Stats:

Total time from first contraction to birth: 2.5 hours!
Augustine Grant Wheaton was born at 12:02am on Sunday, 9/2
He was 4lbs 15oz and 17 inches long

Felicity's Birth

About nine months ago, I got an unexpected call from one of my best friends, Tara, telling me she was pregnant!! Tara and her husband live in Canada, so it's not super easy keeping in touch, but through email and phone conversations here and there, we were able to discuss her pregnancy and what she wanted for her birth. It was such a joy to be able to share my birth story with her, encouraging her to be confident in her Creator and in her body, and not to be fearful! It was also a huge blessing to get to spend some time with her when they came home to visit over the summer. Tara chose to go with a group of midwives (who happen to be abundant up in Canada!), and to deliver in a hospital. She also hired a wonderful doula :)

Here's her story...

"Tuesday, September 27th Clinton and I woke up to a beautiful sunny day at around 7 a.m. I had gotten up around 4:30 in the morning, felt a bit of discomfort in my tummy, but was able to go back to sleep for a bit. Clinton got ready for work and I told him that I would give him a call if things felt different or more intense. So he left and I jumped in the bathtub. I called my good friend Kimo, who is a doula in Illinois, and asked her if what I was feeling might be signs of early labor. She thought that they were and I before I hung up the phone I told her that if I didn’t call her at 1:00 for our scheduled chat she would know why! :o) I then called my doula, Vivian, who we hired in Calgary. She agreed that I was showing signs of early labor and told me to call her whenever I was ready to meet her at the hospital. I called up Clinton and asked him if he would come home, he had only been at school for a half hour. He got home around 9:00 and by this time I was feeling the waves of contractions. Before he got home I had also called my mom and my sister-in-law, Michelle, to tell them that I was in labor and to be praying!

I tried to keep myself busy, cutting my nails and shaving my legs, but as we started timing my contractions we found them to be coming almost every three minutes and lasting 30-40 seconds. Clinton paged our midwife team and Nadine told him that those were pretty close together, and she wanted them to last about a minute to know that active labor was in effect. She was making a house call but would be coming over right after. She showed up somewhere around 11:30 and checked me out only to find that I was already 8 cm dilated. :o) So… a decision had to be made whether we were going to go to the hospital or stay home. Nadine told me that everything was going fine, she had listened to the baby’s heartbeat and said we could stay at home if I wished or go to the hospital, whichever I preferred, it was my choice. I had my hospital bag packed (3 weeks earlier) and had written in my birth plan that that was where I would deliver. I started getting dressed and Clinton told Vivian (doula) to head to the hospital to meet us there. There were no rooms at the Foothills hospital (only 10 minutes away) so we would be going to Rocky View (about a 40 minute drive). I sat at the top of the stairs having another strong contraction and I thought- I don’t know if I can do this in the car. Thinking that I was already 8 cm, who knows how long the rest of my labor would be and why would I want to spend an uncomfortable 40 minutes in the car going through active labor. So I decided to stay home. I had an emergency stash of supplies- garbage bags, old towels, wash cloths- ready to go just in case. I was also comfortable about the idea of a homebirth, not worried about complications because I knew the midwives were skilled enough to let me know if there was any reason for concern and we would need to go to the hospital. The only thing that worried me was the potential mess, which didn’t really happen due to my prepared supplies and all of the things the midwives carry in their car in the event that we do a home birth.

Clinton helped me work through some more intense contractions and also put a focal point in front of me on the bathroom sink; it was the Willow statue I gave him when I told him I was pregnant (a dad holding a little baby and the mom kneeling beside them). As I sat on the toilet (my birthing stool) :o) I kept my gaze on the little baby, that looked like a little peanut, and inside kept telling myself that each contraction was getting me closer to meeting my little one! Vivian arrived around 12:30 and joined right in. She massaged my neck and her and Clinton took turns refilling my water and putting cool cloths on my neck and forehead. Her gentle nature was soothing and her encouraging words continued to help me relax and focus on my goal. After a while I moved to the bathtub…not to have a water birth, just to ease some of the pain. :o) Clinton became my birth stool and sat in his bathing suit on the edge of the bathtub while I propped myself up on his legs and went through a few more heavier contractions. Nadine stayed out of the way, getting things set up for the delivery and continuously checking the baby’s heart rate to make sure things were good. But she also gave me encouraging words through my contractions, telling me I was doing a good job and telling Peanut to come out soon because mommy wants to meet you! The only times Clinton left my side was to go to the bathroom and grab a small snack. While he was eating a fruit bar and the wrapper was crinkling I asked him, in my most polite “contraction” voice…do you think you could eat that later. Ha ha… the funny thing is that when Vivian was going through the snacks I packed I asked her if she could pass me the Swedish berries, which she eagerly handed over! In between contractions I was munching on Swedish berries, my favorite candy- BIG SURPRISE, eh? :o) While in the tub, the other midwife, Claire, arrived and the first thing she said to me was “you’re going to have your baby in the sunshine!” as the light was coming in through the bathroom window. It really was a gorgeous day!

[So peaceful, just before pushing]

Nadine asked me if I wanted to move to the bed and since I’ve never pushed before she would coach me through that. Claire came in as a support and gave me position advice and also made me laugh when the Doppler gel splashed in her eye. She also warmed up some wash clothes with lavendar and put them on my feet…the aromatherapy was refreshing and calming! In the background the IPOD was playing Celtic Women which was soothing Irish music that Claire said was a nice way to welcome my baby. As I laid in bed, Clinton and Vivian held my hands and pushed on a pressure point on my shoulders in between my pushing to speed up contractions. Nadine guided me on how and when to push and breath. Everyone had such encouraging comments... Clinton- "I love you, I'm proud of you" and “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!” – he repeated that to me in English and in Spanish several times throughout the whole labor. Vivian – “you’re doing great, nice rhythm in your breathing!” Nadine – “good job, love!" Claire – “that’s good, take your rest, keep breathing.” I kept thinking to myself, this is painful, but I am handling it. It is not at all what I thought it would feel like, it’s not THAT bad! Crazy, I know…but God truly was giving me the strength and the peace to just allow my body to do what He created it to do. After a little while of pushing Nadine had me reach down and feel the head….so amazing!!! At this point I knew I was going to meet my baby very, very soon! Vivian took a video of Clinton and me saying one last thing before we were going to meet baby Peanut. Then after another good push the head was out…you could see the full head of dark hair and in my next push the rest was out. I pushed for a total of 40 minutes, some in the bathtub and the rest in bed. They placed the baby right on my chest face down and Clinton and I rejoiced in the new arrival of our child! Clinton said “I’d like to call you by name but I don’t know what you are.” So I lifted Peanut up to inspect and said “It’s a girl, her name’s Felicity!” Then just to make sure I asked “It’s a girl, right?” and Nadine and Clinton moved the umbilical cord out of the way and confirmed it… ha ha! :o)

The next few moments were the most special in the world! Clinton was crying, I was too overjoyed to cry (I didn’t cry at all during my labor)! We listened to the new screams of Felicity Catherine and we laughed together at the sight of our beautiful baby girl! She wasn’t all cleaned up yet, but she was so perfect and warm as she laid on my chest and in not too much time was already looking to nurse. :o) Claire helped me out with the football hold and some breastfeeding tips.

I asked Nadine if there was any tearing and she said that looking carefully at things, she would feel more comfortable if we went to the hospital for suturing there. To keep this part short, I had a third degree tear. There’s no specific reason that can determine why I tore the way I did. The doctor that did my stiches said it happens to 1 in 1000. She was the best OB at that hospital, according to Nadine, and she did things quickly and very well. I was happy that Nadine was honest and wise enough to tell me that we needed to go and get things done at the hospital since it was such a rare and bad tear. It was definitely not expected to do things so backwards- have a home birth, then have to go to the hospital, but it actually made me feel SO grateful for the fact that I had Felicity at home. I was so relaxed and that’s why everything went so quickly. I was comfortable in my bathroom, my bathtub, my bed. I had a great team supporting me. The sunshine, music, focal point, and snacks were all helpful tools to aid in a relaxing and rewarding delivery! The trip to the hospital was the worst part of the day, but the fact that the three of us got to sleep in our bed (a birthing bed :o) our first night as a family was so awesome. I'm still amazed at how great Felicity’s birth was! Praise God!!!"

[Tara and her birth team (minus Clinton): her doula, two midwives, and of course baby Felicity]

What a story!!

As I heard bits and pieces of the story from them, I was so suprised and amazed at how her birth unfolded! For instance, how FAST it all happened!! I swear I couldn't even tell she was in labor (by her voice) when she called me at 9 in the morning, and she was 8CM by 11:30? WHAT!!? I had talked to her during the weeks leading up to her birth, and she was just so at peace about her impending labor. Totally calm and confident, with not a trace of fear or worry in her. And I'm sure that her heart's demeanor contributed to her speedy labor.

She e-mailed me later in the morning letting me know that her midwife was on her way over "just to check on me." What a dream! Your midwife coming to your house just to see how you're doing? So cool.

And obviously, the biggest shocker of all, that she made the decision, while she was in labor, to have this baby at home!! What an absolute privilege to have that kind of flexibility with her midwives. She actually called me about a week before her due date asking me what I thought about homebirth, saying that she and Clinton were considering it, but would probably stick with the hospital. The fact that she had the ability to make that kind of a decision so close to the end of her pregnancy (let alone in the middle of labor!) astounded me.

Just hearing about how encouraging everyone was to her, how each member of her birth team had just the right words at just the right time, was so incredible. I truly believe that everything that was orchestrated together for her birth contributed to her smooth, fast, labor, and her ability to cope with it so well. I could not be more happy for Tara and the beautiful, peaceful birth she was blessed with.

And as for our next birth, someone box me up and ship me to Canada ;)

A Summer in the Life of a Doula

Wow!  It's been a long time since I've posted here... probably because I've been at BIRTHS all summer!!  I had a wonderful three months of doula-ing, and last week was my final follow-visit for my last birth of the summer.  Here's a recap of what I've been up to (with names changed) ...

May's birth
In April (I know that's not technically summer, but it was such an awesome birth that I wanted to throw it in :), I had the privilege of attending an incredible and insanely FAST vbac (vaginal birth after cesarean)!!  May had gone into her first birth as most moms do, not really educating herself about labor and birth, and she ended up having "the works" in the hospital.  Pitocin, epidural, c-section.  I loved May so much because she took the traumatic experience of her first birth and used it to change and grow and become a stronger woman.  And let me tell you--she is strong.  Her entire labor was LESS THAN THREE HOURS and completely intense the ENTIRE time.  It was actually kind of funny, because we had spent so much time prenatally preparing for a totally "zen" type of labor, with calming visualization and relaxation techniques, and we used absolutely none of it.  But it was awesome.  She called me at about 1pm, saying that her water broke, I met them at the hospital at about 3pm, and baby was born at 3:22.  It. Was. Insane.  And completely beautiful. 

Christine's birth
Christine's water broke at 10pm about a week before her due date--the first week of May.  She and her husband, Jeremy, worked through early labor at home for most of the night, and met me at the hospital at 8am.  She was definitely in early active labor, having to concentrate through each contraction.  I loved supporting this couple because they worked so well together, Jeremy supporting Christine with the relaxation exercises they had been practicing at home during her pregnancy.  As labor got more intense, it took everything she had to make it through each contraction.  It was an incredible effort for her to even speak, she kept alternating between too hot and too cold, and was nauseous the entire time.  She experienced several moments of self-doubt ("I can't do this for hours and hours!), but pushed through it all with incredible endurance.  Early in pushing, the doctor took a look at her perineum and told us, "Look how tight this is, we are going to need to cut this."  Nevertheless, I coached Christine to keep all those muscles down there relaxed, and to keep her jaws and hands open (per Ina May's "Sphincter Law").  And wouldn't you know it, she opened up just fine, and birthed her baby without even a tear!!  The whole birth was just so rewarding.

Julie's birth
In early July, I had the amazing privilege of attending the second birth of my very first clients!  Julie's first birth was incredibly long (water broke, no contractions, pitocin, hard labor for 8 hours, only 1cm dilated, epidural, rest, FULL DILATION, and two hours of pushing!), and quite the initation to being a doula!  But while spending all that time with her we bonded quite a bit, and became good friends after that.  She was SO hoping to go into labor naturally this time around, but due to some complications in her pregnancy, her doctor wanted to induce her early.  This was my first planned induction, and it was quite different.  The pitocin didn't really do anything the first day, so they turned it off at night and gave it a go again in the morning, this time breaking her water.  That got things moving along, and soon contractions became really painful.  It was such a cool experience coaching her through these contractions, knowing what worked well for her with her first labor.  She eventually opted for the epidural again, knowing firsthand how difficult labor was for her with a broken water bag and pitocin.  Pushing went much smoother this time, and she pushed her second baby boy out in to the hands of his daddy!!  (The doctor had him put on gloves to catch the baby!  So crazy!)  In spite of all the unwanted interventions, it was so good to support Julie and Kevin through their second birth.  What an honor!

Nola's birth
This was probably my favorite birth yet.  It was also my longest (second only to Julie's first!), and most challenging.  Actually, there is so much that I want to say about it that I'll save it for another entry.  Stay posted!  It's a good one!

Jamie's birth
Finally, in August, I had my last birth of the summer.  Jamie had been hoping and preparing for a natural birth, staying at home for as long as possible, and laboring in their secluded outdoor hot tub.  Unfortunately, she had tested positive for Group B Strep, which meant that if her water broke, they would want her to get to this hospital right away.  Which is what happened.  When they got to the hospital, the nurse started pitocin, and I arrived shortly thereafter.  Labor wasn't too painful at first, but quickly intensified and she needed lots of support.  We tried different positions and relaxation techniques, and definitely utilized the shower a few times.  She was laboring beautifully, and was doing a great job with her relaxation, and getting into a rhythm as labor got more difficult.  She made it to 6cm, labored for a couple of more hours, and was still at 6cm.  She had had enough, and chose to get an epidural.  This allowed her to get some rest (it was about 11pm and she had been in pitocin-induced labor ALL day), and was completely dilated at around 3 in the morning.  She pushed like a CHAMP for 2 hours in all different positions, but the baby was not budging.  The doctor recommended a c-setion, which she agreed to, and after quite a rough procedure her baby boy was born (they discovered that he was OP, or "sunny-side up," which is why he wasn't moving through the birth canal.  Babies can definitely be born in this position, but this little guy didn't want to budge).  The doctor had arranged for me to go into the operating room to sit with Jamie while they stiched her up (since dad would go with baby to the nursery).  This was a very cool experience, as I got to be with her as she saw her baby and kissed him for the first time, and as dad got to hold him.  It was such a surreal and sweet moment.  And it was such a joy that I was able to be with her for the next few hours, rubbing her shoulders and neck, and just making sure that she knew she was cared for even though things obviously didn't turn out as planned. 

All in all, I'd say it was a pretty awesome summer in the birth department.  I don't have any clients lined up for the immediate future, and I have to say that it feels AMAZING to not be on call.  And while I'm taking a litttle break from births, I'm working together with some very talented friends on a super-amazing, top secret project, that will hopefully be ready for the public sometime late this fall...  I can't wait to show you!

The Big Nurse-In and Other Thoughts

Last week, a friend of mine was harassed and kicked out of a local resale shop for breastfeeding her baby.

In response, the Crunchy Moms of DeKalb (a local mothering group I helped pioneer last summer), organized a "nurse-in." (Just typing those two words together makes me smile :). Unfortunately, Greg and I had already made plans and were on our way out-of-town Thursday morning, the day of the nurse-in, but I was cheering all those mamas on in spirit, and through facebook.

Driving along Rte 64, I called my mom to check in about a few things, and to share the excitement of the impending nurse-in with her. I was laughing with excitement and just the pure hilarity of it all, but quickly sobered up as she expressed concern and even mild disgust about the whole thing (she had read the article about it in the paper that morning)...

My mom. MY mom was on the other end of the line tell me how inappropriate it is for a mom to nurse uncovered in a public place. My mom, who was with me when I nursed Lucy for the first time in the hospital. My mom, who watched me nurse (covered) in her home, at coffee-shops, and at restaurants. My mom, who cheered me on as I put together our nursing pumpkin display at Pumpkinfest last fall. MY mom, who nursed ME when I was a baby!

Now, don't get my wrong--my mom is an awesome lady. Actually, the fact that she is awesome and has a problem with open nursing got me thinking. That the mother of a crunchy-granola-lovin', tree-hugging, garden-growing, nature-loving, one-grain-short-of-a-hippie daughter would still have a problem with this sort of thing.

And it got me thinking about my pre-mommy days, when I, too, was a little appalled when I saw or heard of a mother nursing her baby without a cover. Even after I had Lucy, though I had no problem nursing her in public, I always did it with my trusty hooter-hider covering me and my tiny baby. At church, I even retreated to the sectioned-off area in the nursery designated for nursing moms only. (Why I felt comfortable nursing Lucy at Borders but not at church is beyond me, and probably worthy of its own blog post...).

I have really grown a lot in my understanding and appreciation of the breastfeeding relationship since becoming a mother, and especially since becoming a party of the Crunchy Moms. Just being around other moms nursing comfortably and openly around each other in a public place has been so liberating! I'm sure with our next child I'll be even more open and comfortable with nursing in public.

But then I think again about my mom, and so many others who have just not been exposed enough to breastfeeding as a beautiful, normal, and essential activity, and have been exposed too much to breasts as strictly sexual objects.

With Lucy, I used my cover for modesty, yes, but mainly for the benefit of others--to avoid awkwardness and making them feel uncomfortable. Really, the last thing I want is to cause a big scene or to be looked upon as some sort of lactation extremist who has no regard for others around her. But the first thing I want is for our community and our culture to look kindly upon breastfeeding mothers, even when the breastfeeding happens in public.

And what better way to influence our culture for the better than to be a living example of the beauty of the breastfeeding relationship, just like my friend was doing last week??

I have no idea. Thoughts?