You Can Do It.

Let's face it: birth is scary. It's unknown. If you've never given birth before, and you live in America, you will, without a doubt, have apprehensions about your ability to birth your baby. I did, for sure. And I don't know any other mom who didn't question herself as she approached her due date.

Why is this? Why do we question our bodies' abilities to give birth, when millions of other women have gone before us and have done just fine?

There are lots of reasons, I think. There are the notorious and unhelpful horror stories told to us as pregnant women, about how unbearably painful labor is. There is the media. The countless pictures of "perfect" bodies we encounter every day certainly do not serve to help our self-images or to boost our confidence in our bodies. There are our doctors, who treat us as if we were a problem to be managed medically, and not as the powerful and truly capable women we are. And the list goes on...

But here's the good news--what no one tells you and what they don't want you to know:

YOU CAN TOTALLY DO IT!!!

If you're educated about the process, well prepared, and have a good support system (doula!), it's not nearly as scary as they say it is. Labor is totally manageable.

I was talking to our local Bradley Method instructor, Susan Booker, about it after observing one of her classes. During the class, she walked us through an average labor--how long your contractions are compared to the amount of resting in-between. I learned that in the typical labor, your uterus is contracting only 11% of the time. ELEVEN PERCENT! So when you hear one of those horror stories about the 20-hour-long labor, she was actually only having contractions for a little over two hours. The early ones don't even hurt! And by the time your labor is really getting going, you have hopefully gotten yourself into a good rhythm and wonderful endorphins are pumping through your veins. You've had a chance in early labor to experiment with what feels good and what makes it worse. And your loving and supportive partners are surrounding you, helping you get through every second.

And contractions aren't normal pain. As many natural childbirth advocates say--it's "pain with a purpose." Labor pain is not sudden or severe, like getting your hand smashed with a hammer or stubbing your toe. It is intense, and in the heat of labor it's honestly quite crazy. But your contractions ebb and flow like a wave. They start soft, build up and then peak, and once you've made it over the top, you sort of float back down to several more minutes of rest and relaxation as you prepare for the next one. As your labor progesses, the contractions get "longer, stronger, and closer together" (as my childbirth ed teacher, Beth, always said), and you get less time to rest. It gets so, sooo hard. But that means it's almost over :) As soon as a laboring mom feels like she doesn't know how much longer she can go on, she's usually minutes away from pushing her baby into the world.

I remember when I was pregnant, worrying about whether or not I would be able to give birth without an epidural or other interventions, talking with my good friend, Lauren (seasoned momma of 4). I told her that Greg and I were going through the Bradley book together, and had been practicing relaxation every night before bed. She said casually, "Oh, you're gonna be fine." I was so surprised at her surety! Her almost nonchalant confidence completely went against all the doubt that had been instilled in me, and gave me that much more belief in my body's truly awesome design.

And I did it. I totally did it! And it was AMAZING!! I have never experienced a higher high than what I felt after going through labor and giving birth to our beautiful daughter.

So don't listen to the doubters and the nay-sayers. Our bodies are powerful and beautiful and totally capable.

You can do it!

Eat Your Placenta

From experience, I know that the first few days post-partum can be crazy in every way. You've just gone through the most physically strenuous event OF YOUR LIFE. ALL your muscles are sore from labor and pushing. Your bottom is sore from all the stretching, tearing, or cutting that happened to make way for your baby. Your stomach went from cute, firm, pregnant belly to a squishy, blubber-like pouch. You are bleeding. You don't even want to think about trying to poop. Your boobs get HUGE, solid as a rock, and oh-so-sore (not to mention they're squirting milk everywhere). You don't get any sleep, because you're up all night trying to figure out the needs of your precious, albeit alien baby whose sudden arrival has thrown everything into utter chaos. And on top of all this, you're trying to figure out how to breastfeed, which is usually much more difficult and painful than expected.

And then there are your hormones. Your raging, out-of-control, PMS-times-ten hormones.

Three days after Lucy's birth, I remember coming home from her 3-day check-up, trying to pull up the driveway, and SCREAMING at my poor husband for not shovelling properly. Now I am usually a very reasonable and laid-back person. But something was happening inside of me that I couldn't control. My emotions were all over the charts, and I was not myself. And it's not just me--practically every mom I know has experienced some version of this emotional upheaval, without realizing that it's normal, and that it can actually be avoided...

I learned a few weeks ago (at the 1st Annual Chicago Doulas Conference!), that all mammals (except for humans) eat their placenta immediately after birth. I know. Gross, huh? But here's the scoop: while you're pregnant, your body, through your placenta, produces this incredible coctail of feel-good hormones that increases as your pregnancy progresses. After you give birth and your placenta is suddenly detached and thrown away, your body sort of comes crashing down. It's literally like going through withdrawal. So on top of everything else (see above), you have to deal with this.

Enter placenta encapsulation specialist! I know that this may seem incredibly gross, but once you get past that "eww" factor, it's really pretty cool.

The specialist will take your placenta, dry it out, and make it into a powder form. Then, she'll put it into little pills. That's it! Just take a couple each day postpartum, and you won't experience such extreme emotions--your body will have a much gentler transition to motherhood. There are other benefits, too. Moms who take their "placenta pills" have more energy postpartum, greater milk supply, and a faster recovery. And if you don't need them all, you can freeze them and use them for menopause!

There are many specialists in the Chicago area, and they usually charge around two hundred dollars. For more information, click here. Let me know if you'd like a referral!

I think those other mammals are on to something... When I'm pregnant with number two, sign me up!

A Natural Approach to Fertility!

My husband and I host an open mic at the Arcedium Coffeehouse in St. Charles once a month, and last month I was perusing the big bulletin board with posters and business cards. I came across one that caught my eye. It read, "Jennifer Mercier-Bone, Doctor of Integrative Holistic Medicine."

I was intrigued.

So I took one, brought it home, and ventured to her website (check it out). WOW! As I poked around, I couldn't help but become thrilled about her ideas and her practice! I was so excited, in fact, that I sent an e-mail AND a voicemail to her office right then and there. She got back to me the next day and offered to meet me at Arcedium for coffee!

So we met last Wednesday, and had a lovely time chatting about home decor, homebirth, fertility, medicine, babies, birth politics in our state, and all things chilbirth. Throughout our conversation, I just couldn't get over the fact that there was a fertility specialist like her so close to home! (She lives in S. Elgin).

She told me a little bit of her story, and how she used to work with Reproductive Endocrinologists and Gynecologists, observing all sorts of medical procedures, especially infertility treatments. She said that she noticed two things about each and every women who came for fertility treatment. One was stress & anxiety. The other was a misaligned uterus. The stress was obvious--women trying to get pregnant without success (which is much more emotionally difficult than most realize), and the cold, sterile environment in which they were being treated. And then there was the uterus. Since she has also had training in massage therapy, she began to come up with her own ideas about massage and how it could help women with their infertility, and she created Mercier Massage Therapy, which involves several sessions of massage around the uterus and in the pelvis region. Somehow, this helps to get everything in order down there, and makes conception much more likely. She had actually just finished a book on her techniques the night before! Her website says, "It is gentle and noninvasive and has a success rate of 71% (IVF's success rate is as low as 20%)." Again I say, WOW! Thank you, God, for a practice like this, so close to home!

I was just so thrilled about the fact that there is a doctor like her in our community. Not only is she gentle, caring, and compassionate toward women and their families, but she also knows her stuff. I was so impressed by her knowledge and insight, AND by her trust our bodies' design. How refreshing to find another like-minded soul! And what a blessing it is to have Dr. Jennifer's practice to refer future mommies to.